I was born for a purpose I do not know… for a part, a song.. a melody.
I believed in dreams then.. but now it seems they only frieghten me.
I recall running with my brother through the fields that surrounded our rural world. I recall the brilliant blue sky, a vast expanse.. an ocean of freedom calling my soul.. and my desire to leap up into the heavens and swim away.
I close my eyes and I see us boys .. racing down the dirt road to our home. We are jumping over the fence.. we are climbed to the highest branches of the tree in our front yard.. we are alive in a way we would never be again.
We believed in everything good.. we played.. we laughted.. we were.. And the knowledge of the comfort of our beds awaiting each night, reassured us when tear made their way into our day that in the end all would be a peaceful sleep.
Reality and dreams blended into one in those days. I cannot tell you now where one began and the other ceast. Then was a time when dreams and life danced as one.. the impossibe was as real as endless time.
* * * *
I swirled through life as stardust in pool of eternal darkness.
I belong somewhere else and every bit of my exsistence yearn to escape.
I envy the plastic bag caught away in the wind.. I wish to be a cloud on a journey halfway across the face of the globe. I desire to know the mystery found six feet below.. but I fear that end may come too soon.
I want to know how the movie ends.. yet I am afraid as the credits roll. I will see I had no part of note.. I fear I will find I was but bit part, a nameless cast.
* * * *
The end comes as thundering steps we never hear.. we will stand barefeet on tempered stones.. a gentel breeze reviving us.. A brilliant sky.. and clarity.. a robed figure to greet eachone.
I wish I could cry. I haven’t any saddness left. I wish I could love with truth and innocents, with a tingle in a touch of finger tips and a trimble in a first kiss.
I wish.. I wish.. I …